July 28, 2025
KEEN AGING: HOW MODERN ELDERS ARE REWRITING GROWING OLD
In today's episode, we had the great opportunity to speak with an amazing author who is changing the outlook on aging! Dr. Corinne Auman, a care management expert and author of "Keenagers: Telling a New Story About Aging," joins us to challenge the overwhelming negativity surrounding the aging process. Drawing from both professional expertise and personal experience caring for family members with dementia and Parkinson's, Dr. Corinne reveals a profound truth: how we think about aging largely...
In today's episode, we had the great opportunity to speak with an amazing author who is changing the outlook on aging! Dr. Corinne Auman, a care management expert and author of "Keenagers: Telling a New Story About Aging," joins us to challenge the overwhelming negativity surrounding the aging process.
Drawing from both professional expertise and personal experience caring for family members with dementia and Parkinson's, Dr. Corinne reveals a profound truth: how we think about aging largely determines how our aging journey unfolds. Those with positive attitudes toward their later years tend to prepare comprehensively, not just financially but emotionally, socially, physically, and spiritually. Meanwhile, those dreading age-related decline often avoid planning altogether, inadvertently creating the very crises they fear.
The language we use matters deeply. When searching for words to describe aging positively while writing her book, Dr. Corinne discovered our vocabulary is dominated by negative terms. This linguistic limitation reflects and reinforces our cultural attitudes. "Keenagers"—older adults who are highly developed and maintain strong interests—offers a fresh alternative that celebrates continued engagement rather than withdrawal.
For caregivers, especially, this perspective shift is transformative. Whether you're currently caregiving or simply wanting to approach your future with greater intention, Dr. Corinne's insights will inspire you to write a new story about aging—one filled with purpose, possibility, and continued growth.
Have you started planning for your aging journey?
To learn more about Dr. Auman, visit corinneauman.com.
Host: J Smiles Comedy
Producer: Mia Hall
Editor: Annelise Udoye
#CaregivingJourney
#DementiaAwareness
#AlzheimersCare
#CaregiverSupport
#HumorInCaregiving
#EndAlz #keenagers #aging
#olderadults
"Alzheimer's is heavy but we ain't gotta be!"
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00:00 - Changing the Narrative Around Aging
09:22 - Dr. Corinne's Caregiving Experience
16:15 - From Theory to Practice in Care Management
21:55 - How Mindset Shapes Our Aging Journey
30:05 - Keenagers: Creating New Language for Aging
38:55 - Resources and Parenting Up Snuggle Ups
WEBVTT
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When I was trying to write a book about let's talk positively about aging.
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It is really really difficult to do that because so much of the language around aging is negative.
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If you just go Google synonyms for older, adult or for aging, the words are really terrible.
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We have a lot of negative words about aging and a few kind of neutral ones, but very few positive words.
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I mean about the best you get is like active ager or elder, but just there's not much just because you turn 50, 55, 60 and your body may be doing.
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maybe your body has limitations it didn't have when you were 30.
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But your body also can do some things and so I love this, the way you're marrying these two thoughts.
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It's like the problems and issues of one allow you to see the possibility and optimism in catching people before you need to hire my care management company.
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So okay, before you need, before you're in the crisis, you can start over here in this book and maybe set your own course, and the crisis might not ever happen.
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How you think about your own aging is going to shape how that aging journey goes for you.
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So what I see in my care management practice is people who are looking forward to growing older.
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They are thinking the best years are ahead of me, this is going to be great, I'm going to have a good time right.
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Those are the people who.
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Parenting Up caregiving adventures with comedian J Smiles is the intense journey of unexpectedly being fully responsible for my mama.
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For over a decade I've been chipping away at the unknown, advocating for her and pushing Alzheimer's awareness on anyone and anything with a heartbeat.
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Spoiler alert this shit is heavy.
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That's why I started doing comedy.
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So be ready for the jokes.
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Caregiver newbies, ogs and village members just willing to prop up a caregiver.
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You are in the right place.
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Hi, this is Zeddy.
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I hope you enjoy my daughter's podcast.
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You double K Day supporter.
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Shout out Cassandra Wheeler.
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Ah Lord, three exclamation points.
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This was so good.
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I put it on while I'm working here at my desk from home, made me miss a meeting and everything.
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With the emoji with the girl with her hand all in her face.
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Y'all know what I'm talking about.
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Thank you, janae, for not only championing and journaling your journey with Zetty, but for creating this platform and sharing your story with the world and opening up an avenue for all caregivers to learn.
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Share love and laugh.
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Love and laugh.
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Appreciate you so much, sis.
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Congrats on your continued success With all kind of emoji kissy faces, hearts, the little heart extra with the fingers, praying hands, fist bumps and all the good jazz.
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Now, if you want to be the recipient of a supporter, shout out.
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You know what to do.
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Leave a review on Apple Podcasts, ig, youtube or join the text community.
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You know what it is Today's episode Keen Aging how Modern Elders Are Rewriting Growing Old, parenting Up Community.
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I know you all are like Jace Miles.
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How are you excited again?
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Well, I'm excited whenever I find good people doing the work, the hard work, of being a caregiver, and they have personal experience, professional experience and they want to share.
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It's not a lot of people who have the courage or the guts or the personality to want to share, and I have one such individual with me right now.
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Dr Corrine, how are you doing?
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I'm doing great today.
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How are you?
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I'm fantastic.
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Thank you for joining us.
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Yeah, thanks for having me.
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Now you have a multitude of caregiving hats.
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You've cared for people in your bloodline and you care for people in your legal line, some in-laws.
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I don't know which one you would prefer to choose.
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To start with you, let us know.
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Oh, the in-laws have since passed away, so they're they're done.
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I'm currently involved with my own parents and their care, so we can talk historical or we can talk current either one.
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Absolutely.
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I would like you to give us a little bit of both, because caring for an in-law has a different emotional and psychological vantage point than caring for one's parent typically, and once a caregiver, always a caregiver.
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So, to the extent that you're comfortable sharing what your capacity was for your in-laws, what involvement you had with their care and what diseases they were diagnosed with, Sure.
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So this is, in particular, my father-in-law who had dementia father-in-law who had dementia, and I'm in a little bit of a unique situation because I do run a company that is a care management agency, so I do have more experience in the field than a typical caregiver might have, and so that's a little bit.
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Hold on, dr Corrine, I'm going to look, I'm going to go ahead and spice that up.
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Honey, you have way more experience, not only the family caregivers been doctors and geriatricians because I've been in these mean streets for over 13 years, yeah and an individual who is running a care management company.
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The name is in the title and we're going to dig into that even a little bit more.
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So, but thank you for letting us know a little bit more about your expertise.
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And that really played into the situation.
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Because when we realized, you know kind of what was happening with my father-in-law, it was kind of this moment where everyone in the family just kind of turned and looked at me and said what are we?
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What are we going to do?
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Right, how are we going to find him?
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Cause he needed he was living alone, it was not safe, how are we going to find him Placement in a memory care?
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And so it really fell upon me, because of my background, to then try to find an appropriate memory care.
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He was going to qualify for Medicaid sorry, medicaid and get him into a community that would then accept Medicaid and then monitor him right, Go visit, make sure he's doing everything, getting everything he needed.
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He also had all his health care through the VA.
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So we would pick him up from the memory care and take him to the nearest VA in order to get his health care and then get him back.
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And if you've ever tried to transport someone who has dementia to a doctor's appointment and convince them that that's where they need to be and then get them back in the car to go back to the community, I mean.
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And so all of those things really fell upon me.
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But again I had an unfair advantage because I do run this agency and so not only do I have expertise in the field, but I also have team members who I can lean on and say, hey, can you help me get these things done?
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Because they are also experts in the field.
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So you know, that whole process, I think, really fell upon me because of my background, which maybe it would have anyway, as a daughter-in-law who lives close by right, we see that all the time.
00:09:00.143 --> 00:09:20.875
From what I've heard, dr Corrine, the live close by already puts you toward the top of the list, and when you have daughter or sister or anything that sounds female-ish, it seems that they look to us faster as well.
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How long had you been managing or in the world of care management?
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Has that been your career, the majority of your adult life, or how did you get involved with that?
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Well, so I started my company in 2012.
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So we've been doing this now 13 or so years and prior to that my background is in gerontology, so it is in working in the aging world in the field.
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But it was really like as a college professor, teaching about older adults and teaching about, you know what we know about growing older and working with college students who want to learn about that sort of thing.
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So when I made, the transition from here is theory and research into here is everyday, practical.
00:10:09.904 --> 00:10:12.951
Let's go out and work in this field.
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It's really two different worlds.
00:10:15.174 --> 00:10:18.764
Yes, it is, yeah, really, really different.
00:10:18.884 --> 00:10:35.581
So I always had an interest in working with older adults, and part of that came from living next door to my grandparents growing up and then also watching my mom and her sister become caregivers for their mother.
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My grandfather passed away fairly suddenly and they realized almost overnight that their mother could not be left alone because he had been doing such a good job of protecting her that my mom and her sister really didn't realize that her dementia was as bad as it was, and so she moved in with us very quickly after my grandfather passed, and that was when I was in eighth grade and she passed away when I was a junior in college.
00:11:08.464 --> 00:11:25.351
So from eighth grade till I was a junior in college my mom and her sister were managing my grandmother's care and that made a real impression on me because it was hard me because it was hard, they made mistakes.
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And I just remember thinking at that time why isn't there somebody who helps you with this Right, like, why can't you just pick up the phone and call somebody and they tell you like here are your options for home care or here's where you go for this kind of care?
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And that would have made it so much better.
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And I think that kind of planted the seed for me to then go on middle school, high school, college, when normally, if you let mainstream tell it, you're just supposed to be caring about your friends or going to a frat party or getting to a football game or whatever it is that they believe that adolescents do.
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Yet and still, you were being impacted and absorbing what was happening in your immediate family, so much so you were like I'm going to do something about it.
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So while that was a difficult time, then there are people like me who have the benefit of you joining this career field from a place of passion and purpose, and I can tell you that has made all the difference for me as a caregiver for my mom.
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You can tell when someone is doing a job, because they happen to have a skillset or talents that kind of leaned into it versus that plus.
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This is personal, and that's what I'm hearing from you right now, dr Corrine.
00:13:05.855 --> 00:13:12.494
This entire world of the aging population is very personal for you.
00:13:13.039 --> 00:13:14.325
Yeah, 100%.
00:13:14.645 --> 00:13:15.328
Yep, I love it.
00:13:15.328 --> 00:13:16.942
So what was your?
00:13:16.942 --> 00:13:37.947
So actually, when I look back at it, if I take it back, well then you know you've been a caregiver since the eighth grade maybe, like if your grandmother moved in, I'm certain, while you weren't the primary caregiver, you were a secondary or a tertiary caregiver, because I'm sure there were moments where your mom or your aunt or others in your family said, hey, can you do this?
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So we need you to do this, or pitch in or things in that way.
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And you became aware, like you've already shared with us, of what the needs were and how many gaps there were in the system that you thought should exist by.
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Some adult ought to be able to fix this.
00:13:53.662 --> 00:13:56.649
But back to your father-in-law.
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What was his dementia?
00:14:00.000 --> 00:14:03.265
You know, we never got a clear answer about that.
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He was fairly young, he was in his early 60s, he'd been in the Vietnam War and had been exposed to like Agent Orange and things like that during that time, and so we don't.
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We assume it's something to do with that because it didn't really run in his family or anything, but we don't really know.
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We never pursued getting a clear diagnosis.
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It was just clear he had dementia.
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I got you, I understand, and what was your?
00:14:33.573 --> 00:14:42.865
You ran through a litany of items that you had to do and I got to tell you my head and my heart were both spinning.
00:14:42.865 --> 00:14:58.696
I was cheering you on and I was happy for your family members and I was also exhausted at the thought of, you know, identifying all of those resources and then scheduling and then the execution and then the follow up.
00:14:58.696 --> 00:15:01.225
That is, you can't just Google that stuff.
00:15:01.225 --> 00:15:01.927
You know you can't.
00:15:01.927 --> 00:15:04.609
You can't, you can't go to Yahoo, you can't.
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There's no singular source.
00:15:05.501 --> 00:15:06.163
Well, obviously, can't, you can't.
00:15:06.163 --> 00:15:06.339
You can't go to Yahoo, you can't.
00:15:06.339 --> 00:15:06.591
There's no singular source.
00:15:06.591 --> 00:15:21.293
Well, obviously now and we will talk about this more at the end but they can call your company, but other than finding a company like yours or a consultant, there's no specific journey to do it.
00:15:21.293 --> 00:15:28.644
So I, if I was in your family, I would have also turned to you and looked and said, okay, so now what do we do?
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It's fair.
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It was a fair thing to have happen, yeah.
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Yeah, yeah.
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Do you feel that it was tougher on you because of the emotional component as well as the professional component?
00:15:44.230 --> 00:15:52.951
Or did you just kind of compartmentalize and say I just got to check these boxes and get this paperwork in for your father-in-law?
00:15:52.951 --> 00:15:53.721
I?
00:15:53.821 --> 00:15:57.149
think I compartmentalized for the most part.
00:15:57.149 --> 00:16:10.214
You know, I think there might've been a few moments in my marriage where where I, my husband, might have gotten the brunt of.
00:16:10.214 --> 00:16:22.167
You know, this is not my parent and all the things that, and and to be fair, you know it's not his fault that he doesn't know the things I know.
00:16:22.167 --> 00:16:33.051
I mean, of course he's going to be looking at you know, to me, for those answers, those answers.
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But again, I don't.
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You don't know how different that would be if I didn't have my expertise, because we see so many adult daughters and sisters and daughters-in-law who do get put in that position.
00:16:39.152 --> 00:16:49.621
I mean, most of my phone calls are from people in those positions in a family and so, but no, I think that just every once in a while there was just sort of this.
00:16:49.621 --> 00:16:53.024
I think that just every once in a while there was just sort of this.
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You know, right, you know.
00:16:55.130 --> 00:16:55.510
Your dad.
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There's a there should be some separation here, a dotted line, and not this solid line pointing directly at me.
00:17:01.817 --> 00:17:04.540
Right, I get it, I follow what you're saying.
00:17:04.540 --> 00:17:06.163
And now you?
00:17:06.163 --> 00:17:09.266
You said, both of your in-laws have passed on.
00:17:09.266 --> 00:17:18.683
They have, yes, and, but you're continuing in your role of caregiving now for your parents.
00:17:19.345 --> 00:17:20.672
Sure, and it's more so.
00:17:20.672 --> 00:17:29.038
My dad has Parkinson's and is doing well but, you know, is needing more things as time goes on.
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I'll tell you a funny story that's one of the funny stories I have but my mom is his primary caregiver and primary, you know, help around the house and she's doing really well, but it's more the kind of the tertiary right, the supporting right, Make.
00:17:46.990 --> 00:18:00.777
You know, she calls and, you know, tells me things that are going on and I maybe give her some feedback or advice of things we might try or things we might do differently, which I think is helpful most of the time.
00:18:00.777 --> 00:18:09.699
But there's also this sort of unwritten rule that if somebody changed your diaper, they don't have to listen to you, they don't have to listen to you.
00:18:09.699 --> 00:18:22.599
So the there there is always this sort of you know they listen, but do they listen?
00:18:22.599 --> 00:18:23.142
They listen.
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But will they actually take the advice?
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It's a question Not in my family.
00:18:33.090 --> 00:18:36.215
Everyone who changed my diaper or blew my nose with a q-tip or whatever that stuff is, yeah, they don't listen at all, dr corinne.
00:18:36.215 --> 00:18:36.416
So I, I do.
00:18:36.416 --> 00:18:42.894
I'm far, I'm picking up what you're putting down um a bit of a helpful.
00:18:42.894 --> 00:18:44.180
Um.
00:18:44.180 --> 00:18:55.478
One thing that has been very helpful to many people in the parenting up community is knowing symptoms or signs.
00:18:55.478 --> 00:19:03.034
Do you recall what your father was exhibiting that led y'all to say, hey, something's not quite right?
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You know, prior to his diagnosis, that even made you say dad needs to go to the doctor.
00:19:08.634 --> 00:19:10.657
Were you involved in that process?
00:19:11.660 --> 00:19:24.114
I was only involved in it again, kind of on the outside, in terms of my mom kind of telling me what was happening, the changes that were that they were seeing.
00:19:24.114 --> 00:19:27.059
And it's funny now looking back.
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You know, one of the first things you see or notice with a lot of people who eventually develop Parkinson's is they start to kind of lose facial expressions.
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And now I can go back and kind of look at some of the pictures from you know Thanksgiving, when my son was a year old, and go, oh yeah, like I can see that like my dad he doesn't smile anymore, like he wasn't able to have those same sorts of or they think they're smiling, but they're they're not, like their face doesn't really show it.
00:19:57.931 --> 00:20:01.699
And so I can go back now and see some of those signs.
00:20:01.699 --> 00:20:04.090
But did I notice them at the time?
00:20:04.090 --> 00:20:05.492
Not necessarily.
00:20:06.173 --> 00:20:31.026
And and it you know my dad is proud and maybe a little stubborn and I think you know it had to different things.
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We think somehow not knowing is better than knowing right, and we see this so much with dementia, where people have they know something is wrong.
00:20:43.310 --> 00:20:53.922
And that should be the moment that we go and we get tested and we get a diagnosis so we can get on the medication to slow things down and we can prepare and do all the things.
00:20:53.922 --> 00:21:03.585
But that is exactly opposite of how people actually react, which is they know something's wrong and they do not want to go to the doctor.
00:21:03.585 --> 00:21:05.253
They do not want to know.
00:21:05.253 --> 00:21:09.182
They it's like if they never get a diagnosis, that means it's not really happening.
00:21:09.971 --> 00:21:10.292
I have.
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I have heard the same thing and witnessed the same thing.
00:21:13.424 --> 00:21:30.721
So much, dr Corrine, and I'm going to ask you this, because you are a professional in this space Do you think it leans more from the well, I'm going to die of something anyway, and so just if I don't know about it, then I won't be paranoid or have anxiety?
00:21:30.721 --> 00:21:36.974
Just if I don't know about it, then I won't be paranoid or have anxiety?
00:21:36.974 --> 00:21:56.163
Or is it possibly because, since the dementia-related diseases do not have a cure and they can't fix it, whereas, let's say, if you thought you were having problems with your heart or your cholesterol or your kidneys or diabetes, and there have been treatments and or cures, people may be more likely to go to the doctor for that?
00:21:56.163 --> 00:22:02.682
Do you feel like that has played a role in any of these lack of efforts to go to the doctor?
00:22:03.665 --> 00:22:06.332
I actually think it's something different.
00:22:06.332 --> 00:22:08.455
Not one of the things you mentioned.
00:22:08.455 --> 00:22:13.824
I think it is fear of loss of control.
00:22:13.824 --> 00:22:29.252
So if I get diagnosed with some form of dementia, my kids are going to try to take over my life, my kids are going to try to take over my finances, they're going to try to move me into a home.
00:22:29.252 --> 00:22:30.733
I'm so.
00:22:30.733 --> 00:23:04.564
I really think it comes from that internal fear that, as that, I'm going to lose my mind or I've already lost it, and that sort of fear of losing control I think is a huge driver of not wanting to get an official diagnosis.
00:23:05.631 --> 00:23:07.298
That makes a lot of sense in the world.
00:23:07.298 --> 00:23:10.798
I never thought about that, but yeah, that tracks.
00:23:10.798 --> 00:23:12.201
That really tracks.
00:23:12.201 --> 00:23:13.613
Hey, what's up?
00:23:13.613 --> 00:23:14.978
Parented Up family.
00:23:14.978 --> 00:23:15.799
Guess what.
00:23:15.799 --> 00:23:18.759
Have you ever wanted to connect with other caregivers?
00:23:18.759 --> 00:23:21.939
You want to see more behind-the-scenes footage?
00:23:21.939 --> 00:23:24.258
Want to know what me and Zeddy are doing?
00:23:24.258 --> 00:23:27.113
I know you do All things.
00:23:27.113 --> 00:23:33.457
Jsmiles are finally ready for you, even when I go live.
00:23:33.457 --> 00:23:38.319
Do it now with us on Patreon.
00:23:38.319 --> 00:23:42.420
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00:23:45.018 --> 00:23:48.095
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00:23:48.095 --> 00:23:52.222
Slash JilesStudios with an S.
00:23:52.222 --> 00:24:20.583
Well, I see, for those of you who are listening and not watching this podcast, or shall I say vodcast our video, I see behind you, dr Corrine, a phenomenal book cover An Owl on a Tree and the title is Teenagers with a K, telling a New Story About Aging.
00:24:20.583 --> 00:24:23.595
And you wrote it.
00:24:23.595 --> 00:24:30.080
I did Because some people have books behind them, great books that they love, but it doesn not.
00:24:30.080 --> 00:24:31.804
They doesn't mean they're the author.
00:24:31.804 --> 00:24:33.893
This is your book.
00:24:33.893 --> 00:24:35.155
Tell us about teenagers.
00:24:35.797 --> 00:24:37.740
Yeah, so I'm going to.
00:24:37.740 --> 00:24:40.953
I'm going to make a little juxtaposition for you.
00:24:40.953 --> 00:24:56.153
So I work in care management, where I'm dealing with people who are often in crisis around aging, right, and I've written this book where I'm trying to get people to change their views on aging.
00:24:56.153 --> 00:25:00.911
Instead of thinking of it in a negative way, let's think about it in a positive way.
00:25:00.911 --> 00:25:06.709
And people kind of look at these two things and they go this makes no sense, right?
00:25:06.709 --> 00:25:14.075
Because you're dealing with people who are in like the nitty gritty and maybe not so great part sometimes, and then you've written this book.
00:25:14.075 --> 00:25:15.900
That's like, hey, let's tell a new story.
00:25:15.900 --> 00:25:40.605
But so I want to explain where that comes from, that the way you think about your own aging and the journey that's in front of you really shapes and impacts how well that journey is going to go.
00:25:41.607 --> 00:25:47.321
So, for example, Wait, wait, dr C, that's so powerful I'm going to need you to say that again.
00:25:47.321 --> 00:25:51.116
That is the well.
00:25:51.116 --> 00:25:51.618
However you want.
00:25:51.618 --> 00:25:59.782
It doesn't have to be exact, but that is like grasping the sun and putting it in my pocket.
00:25:59.782 --> 00:26:04.973
Please, however you want to word it, do your best.
00:26:04.973 --> 00:26:06.556
Rendition of a rewind.
00:26:06.955 --> 00:26:07.336
Okay.
00:26:07.336 --> 00:26:16.426
So how you think about your own aging is going to shape how that aging journey goes for you.
00:26:16.426 --> 00:26:24.784
So what I see in my care management practice is people who are looking forward to growing older.
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They are thinking the best years are ahead of me, this is going to be great, I'm going to have a good time right.
00:26:30.678 --> 00:26:35.285
Those are the people who plan and prepare.
00:26:35.285 --> 00:26:51.713
They do all their documents, they talk to their family, they're planning financially for their future, but they're also planning for their spiritual life, their physical life, their intellectual life, their emotional life and their social life.
00:26:51.713 --> 00:26:57.101
In all these retirement I'm going to put retirement in quotes retirement years ahead of them.
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They're looking, they're going.
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This is going to be good, I can't wait, let's do it.
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And they're making a plan.
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The people who have a negative outlook about their aging, like they're going oh man, this is going to be awful.
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This is, it is all downhill from here.
00:27:12.798 --> 00:27:14.241
This sucks.
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Aging sucks.
00:27:15.473 --> 00:27:16.438
You know the whole thing.
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Those are the people who kind of bury their head in the sand and they don't plan and they don't prepare.
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