Oct. 13, 2025

Parenting Up! 5th Anniversary Vlog

Parenting Up! 5th Anniversary Vlog

Five years later, the room is louder, the laughs are bigger, and the village is real. We took our microphones into a buzzing anniversary reception at Buckhead Art & Company and let our community speak: caregivers who’ve lost, caregivers who are still in the thick of it, friends who learned how to show up, and pros who stepped in with services, strength, and heart. It wasn’t staged—it was hugs, dance breaks, and testimonies that prove love can outlast timelines and community can carry weight you shouldn’t have to hold alone.

We reflect on how a daughter’s caregiving story became a global network for Alzheimer’s and dementia support, how humor makes space for hard truths, and how simple acts—an Uber gift card, a lunch invite, a text—can keep burnout at bay. You’ll hear why Zaddy’s 77th matters to a neurologist’s old clock, how we turned pandemic isolation skills into everyday resilience, and why asking your neighbor, your dentist, or your church for help is not weakness but strategy. From NPR spotlights to cross‑country listeners, this milestone is a reminder that caregivers deserve visibility, fair wages for professional helpers, flexible work, and real community care.

If you’re a caregiver, you’ll find hope and practical ideas. If you love a caregiver, you’ll leave with a playbook for showing up. Stick around for heartfelt supporter messages, gratitude for our behind‑the‑scenes team, and an open invite to join us on Patreon for closer connection and behind‑the‑scenes moments. Subscribe, share this with someone who needs a lift today, and leave a review telling us one small act that made your week lighter. Your story helps another caregiver breathe.

Support the show

"Alzheimer's is heavy but we ain't gotta be!"
IG: https://www.instagram.com/parentingup
FB: https://www.facebook.com/parentingup
YT: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCDGFb1t2RC_m1yMnFJ2T4jw
Patreon: https://patreon.com/jsmilesstudios
TEXT 'PODCAST" to +1 404 737 1449 - to give J topic ideas, feedback, say hi!
Be sure to leave us a review!

00:00 - Welcome & Fifth Anniversary Reveal

02:24 - Supporter Shout‑Outs From the Party

07:08 - Live From Buckhead: Why We Gather

10:54 - Dad at 77 and The Power of Village

18:33 - Proof You Can Build a New Life

WEBVTT

00:01:14.719 --> 00:01:17.200
In the event or when that time comes.

00:01:17.599 --> 00:01:21.359
Parenting up Caregiving Adventures with comedian Jay Smiles.

00:01:21.519 --> 00:01:27.040
It's the intense journey of unexpectedness, being fully responsible for my mama.

00:01:27.359 --> 00:01:39.120
For over a decade, I've been chipping away at the unknown, advocating for her, and pushing Alzheimer's awareness on anyone in anything with a heartbeat.

00:01:45.120 --> 00:01:46.799
Don't be afraid for the jokes.

00:01:47.359 --> 00:01:54.799
Caregiver newbie, OG, and village members just willing to prop up a caregiver.

00:01:55.040 --> 00:01:56.879
You are in the right place.

00:01:57.519 --> 00:01:59.840
Hi, this is good.

00:02:00.640 --> 00:02:05.519
I hope you enjoy my daughter's podcast.

00:02:06.239 --> 00:02:06.400
Okay.

00:02:07.680 --> 00:02:11.039
Today's episode, the fifth anniversary vlog.

00:02:24.719 --> 00:02:33.280
Today's supporter shout-out came from people who were actually in the building celebrating the fifth anniversary for Parenting Up Podcast.

00:02:33.360 --> 00:02:34.159
Check them out.

00:02:34.400 --> 00:02:36.080
Hi, I'm Monica Cost.

00:02:36.879 --> 00:02:39.120
Hello, I'm Aletha Taylor.

00:02:40.240 --> 00:02:48.639
One of the things I love about Parenting Up is bringing these tough conversations to the public.

00:02:48.879 --> 00:03:02.319
A lot of times we don't like to talk about some of the harder things that are happening in our lives, but she's been so bold as to tell her truth, and it's impacting people and helping other people learn how to care for their loved ones.

00:03:03.439 --> 00:03:09.520
So for me, one thing that I love is that I'm able to share it with so many of my friends.

00:03:09.919 --> 00:03:13.759
Even before I came to the event, I was like, oh my gosh, I forgot.

00:03:13.919 --> 00:03:23.120
Your mother has Alzheimer's, and I'm going to an event where my sorority sister's mother is going to be on a podcast.

00:03:23.199 --> 00:03:24.639
So I'll have to send that to you.

00:03:24.719 --> 00:03:25.919
And I do that often.

00:03:26.159 --> 00:03:29.360
So I really appreciate that she's doing that.

00:03:29.439 --> 00:03:38.159
And then it allows me to kind of have an understanding into what she's going through and also what my other friends are going through.

00:03:38.319 --> 00:03:41.439
So I'm very appreciative for her podcast.

00:03:41.919 --> 00:03:44.479
Hi, my name is Julia Demetrius.

00:03:44.560 --> 00:03:49.599
And what I love about the podcast is she shares so much excellent information.

00:03:49.840 --> 00:03:56.800
My husband and I both have aging parents, and we're learning a lot of good information about what to expect.

00:03:57.280 --> 00:03:58.800
Luckily, we still have my parents.

00:03:58.879 --> 00:04:02.560
They're 80 and 81, but you never know what life brings.

00:04:02.639 --> 00:04:07.120
And so I love and I value all the advice that I get from Janae from her podcast.

00:04:07.360 --> 00:04:12.560
I'm Mylyn Smith, and parenting up is really important to me.

00:04:13.120 --> 00:04:17.199
Growing up, you know, being taken care of by your parents.

00:04:17.360 --> 00:04:23.839
Now we're in a position where we're responsible for taking care of them, and it's a true honor, it's a blessing, and it's a lot of work.

00:04:24.000 --> 00:04:34.480
And one of my favorite memories about the Parenting Up podcast is just that Jay provides a space and an environment where you can not take your role so serious.

00:04:34.720 --> 00:04:46.639
And um you can relax a little bit, you can laugh at some of the hard things that you've gone through, and you find a community of people who have been through some of the same things that you've gone through when you think you're the only one.

00:04:46.879 --> 00:04:49.920
So thank you for creating this space for all of us.

00:04:50.079 --> 00:04:55.120
Thank you for the laughter because it's a little bit of humor that we need to get through every day.

00:04:55.279 --> 00:04:56.959
And just thank you for being you.

00:04:57.120 --> 00:04:58.079
I appreciate you.

00:04:58.319 --> 00:05:01.199
Hello, I'm Mark Williams from Dallas, Texas.

00:05:01.439 --> 00:05:03.920
So I'm a caregiver as well as Janae.

00:05:04.319 --> 00:05:06.800
Um, both my parents live in Dallas, Texas.

00:05:06.879 --> 00:05:16.879
I just lost my mother five weeks ago to death, and now I have my dad who has dementia, and uh I'm his caregiver, and I'm super proud of that.

00:05:17.040 --> 00:05:21.360
You know, I take care of his medicine, I make sure he eats, I make sure he gets to his doctor's appointments.

00:05:21.600 --> 00:05:25.120
I'm basically his parent and I enjoy it.

00:05:25.279 --> 00:05:27.920
Uh I wish my mom was still walking the earth.

00:05:28.079 --> 00:05:29.759
I was here this week to support Jay.

00:05:29.839 --> 00:05:34.800
I've known Janae for over 25 years, and uh I know she's a caregiver.

00:05:34.959 --> 00:05:40.240
I've learned everything I know from her, and just to see her with her mom, it's just the most beautiful thing.

00:05:40.319 --> 00:05:43.920
So, congratulations to Jay and everyone that's working with Jay.

00:05:44.160 --> 00:05:45.360
Job well done.

00:05:45.759 --> 00:05:52.240
My name is Erica Watson, and I am one of Janae's assiduous 40 babies.

00:05:52.560 --> 00:05:59.600
Janae, you have always been such an inspiration and such a guiding light for not just me, but for so many people.

00:05:59.759 --> 00:06:12.079
And as I went through my own caregiver parenting up journey with my mom, I knew I was in the best hands, just learning from you and watching how you witness and do this work with such joy.

00:06:12.319 --> 00:06:17.360
And not letting go of yourself in the process of caregiving.

00:06:17.519 --> 00:06:27.199
So I'm glad that you're taking a moment to celebrate five years of parenting up and just know that your village has got your back five ever.

00:06:28.000 --> 00:06:30.160
All right, I'm Zach Wright Fisher.

00:06:30.240 --> 00:06:31.279
I know Jay.

00:06:31.439 --> 00:06:33.680
Uh, she comes in and sees me at Stretch Lab.

00:06:33.839 --> 00:06:35.360
I'm a stretch therapist.

00:06:35.600 --> 00:06:39.839
Uh congratulations on your fifth anniversary here.

00:06:40.240 --> 00:06:45.600
And Jay, just keep inspiring others, moving forward and changing the world one step at a time.

00:06:45.920 --> 00:06:53.040
Thank you all so much for taking the time to give us those supporters shout outs in the middle of eating, drinking, and dancing.

00:06:53.120 --> 00:06:54.879
That was a whole lot to balance.

00:06:55.040 --> 00:06:59.680
Now, if you want to be the recipient of a supporter shout out, you know what to do.

00:07:00.000 --> 00:07:03.920
Get to us on YouTube or Facebook.

00:07:04.480 --> 00:07:05.439
Parenting Up.

00:07:05.600 --> 00:07:07.519
That's where we are everywhere, baby.

00:07:07.759 --> 00:07:08.879
Hey family, what's up?

00:07:08.959 --> 00:07:10.319
It's your girl Jay Smiles.

00:07:10.639 --> 00:07:12.399
This is a magnificent day.

00:07:12.639 --> 00:07:15.360
We are in Atlanta in the Buckhead shops.

00:07:15.519 --> 00:07:20.240
We have a major reception happening at Buckhead Art and Company.

00:07:20.560 --> 00:07:20.959
Why?

00:07:21.519 --> 00:07:22.879
We've made it to five years.

00:07:23.199 --> 00:07:27.279
The Parenting Up Podcast, our global family caregiving community.

00:07:27.519 --> 00:07:29.680
We are five years old.

00:07:29.839 --> 00:07:32.000
We big kids on the block now.

00:07:32.319 --> 00:07:34.399
And today is Daddy's birthday.

00:07:34.639 --> 00:07:43.120
So we are celebrating five years of growth, of community, of excellence, and Daddy is 77.

00:07:43.680 --> 00:07:48.560
Neurologist thought he would have been out of here about seven or eight years ago.

00:07:48.800 --> 00:07:55.839
But through love and commitment and village, we don't know how long we have.

00:08:33.519 --> 00:08:37.759
Many of us will get the call or unfortunately or unfortunately get the opportunity.

00:08:37.919 --> 00:08:39.440
Good thing bad, I think who knows.

00:08:39.519 --> 00:08:46.720
It also gives us an opportunity to love on people in a way that we may not have, had we not had that opportunity.

00:08:46.879 --> 00:09:09.120
So if you know of a caregiver, please leave this weekend with an extra uh fullness in your heart to tell them thank you, to get send them to lunch, to give them a Uber gift card, to send them some flowers, to let them know that their gift to humanity through the care that they give their loved ones is appreciated about itself.

00:09:09.519 --> 00:09:11.120
It's Daddy's birthday.

00:10:33.120 --> 00:10:38.639
Um my mom was diagnosed with two forms of dementia, 13 and a half years ago.

00:10:40.000 --> 00:10:44.320
The best in a while in this in the country told me three, six years.

00:10:45.360 --> 00:10:49.440
But when it feels like, no, we're 13.

00:10:56.639 --> 00:11:00.320
She has a way of letting you know little listeners, and don't do that.

00:11:01.679 --> 00:11:07.120
Um so being a caregiver has changed my life.

00:11:07.360 --> 00:11:09.120
It's the reason I'm a comedian.

00:11:09.279 --> 00:11:11.279
It's the reason there's a podcast.

00:11:12.480 --> 00:11:16.080
The podcast is now uh on every continent.

00:11:16.240 --> 00:11:30.720
Um we've been on NPR, NBC, all the both films and selection situations, but the biggest thing is that I wanted to be proof that you can be okay when you're a committed family caregiver.

00:11:31.039 --> 00:11:33.279
You can't figure out how to have some kind of life.

00:11:33.440 --> 00:11:35.600
It ain't gonna be the same life.

00:11:35.840 --> 00:11:38.000
You just gotta make a new life.

00:11:38.320 --> 00:11:42.480
And there are a lot of us out here who need your continued support of y'all.

00:11:42.639 --> 00:11:46.720
So everything that you're doing for us, we see it and we thank you.

00:11:46.799 --> 00:11:50.320
Whether it's a phone call or a text or hey day, let's go out to lunch.

00:11:50.480 --> 00:11:55.039
Even if I say no, the fact that you asked, bring it in the gallery.

00:11:55.679 --> 00:11:59.600
To all of the sponsors, they say no.

00:12:00.159 --> 00:12:01.200
That's what they're saying.

00:12:01.759 --> 00:12:03.919
To all the sponsors, I can't thank you enough.

00:12:04.000 --> 00:12:06.879
I wouldn't have been able to do this without you.

00:12:07.200 --> 00:12:11.600
And umward and lower and better and better and better.

00:12:11.679 --> 00:12:13.840
We're gonna get a cure for this disease.

00:12:14.000 --> 00:12:24.639
And then the key time is to pay a fair wage or get a job that finds it to work from home or something.

00:12:24.879 --> 00:12:26.320
Something, something, something, something.

00:12:26.399 --> 00:12:27.120
I love y'all.

00:12:27.200 --> 00:12:32.960
The music is gonna get a little more upbeat, so y'all can dance if you want to, you can drink if you want to.

00:12:33.759 --> 00:12:35.919
Please do watch the whole video.

00:12:36.320 --> 00:12:38.720
Some of you will find yourselves in there.

00:12:39.200 --> 00:12:40.399
I love you all.

00:12:40.879 --> 00:12:48.799
Thank you for helping me take care of awesome.

00:12:48.879 --> 00:12:53.360
Well, continue to network and have lymations and food.

00:12:53.440 --> 00:12:58.639
There is a cutout over there of Zebbie and Jay.

00:12:58.799 --> 00:13:00.879
Please take a picture with them posted.

00:13:01.440 --> 00:13:05.679
Hashtag parenting of fifth anniversary.

00:13:05.919 --> 00:13:07.279
Laura's is that it for her birthday?

00:13:07.360 --> 00:13:08.240
I'm gonna give it to another.

00:13:08.799 --> 00:13:15.919
Wait, mommy, look and if it wasn't for Monica, I wouldn't have met Jay, so I wanted to give Monica this.

00:13:16.000 --> 00:13:16.720
Where'd she go?

00:13:18.720 --> 00:13:27.440
Oh, so I wanted to give her that, and then we have one more for the host, Jay Smiles, and it's coming in from the back.

00:13:27.679 --> 00:13:28.159
Thank you.

00:13:28.799 --> 00:13:29.840
So, yeah, so thank you.

00:13:29.919 --> 00:13:31.519
I just wanted to say thank you, and thank you, everybody.

00:13:31.679 --> 00:13:35.120
If anybody has anything to say about the podcast, we have Annalise.

00:13:35.519 --> 00:13:38.559
Shout out to our video editor, Sam.

00:13:40.960 --> 00:13:43.679
We love her, and she is going to take testimonials.

00:13:43.759 --> 00:13:47.600
I know some of you came from far away, so please feel free to go in front of the step and repeat.

00:13:47.759 --> 00:13:50.799
We would love to get your beautiful faces on camera saying happy anniversary.

00:13:50.960 --> 00:13:52.720
And you will be on our YouTube page.

00:13:52.879 --> 00:13:55.759
You will be on the podcast for the fifth anniversary podcast.

00:13:56.000 --> 00:13:57.919
So uh please be sure to see us, alright?

00:14:03.279 --> 00:14:04.799
All right, we can get the music.

00:14:08.639 --> 00:14:13.440
Okay, the last thing I was gonna say after I set Zaddy down, I can see Zaddy about to leave.

00:14:13.519 --> 00:14:17.039
So anybody who wants to say, hey, Zaddy, just watch me walk out the door.

00:14:17.360 --> 00:14:21.840
But the person holding the mic is me a haul.

00:14:22.080 --> 00:14:26.960
My podcast would not be exploding like it is without her and Annalise.

00:14:27.440 --> 00:14:32.559
The three of us together, while we all have our individual companies, but when we are together, we are what?

00:14:32.960 --> 00:14:34.879
WP, waste of productions.

00:14:34.960 --> 00:14:42.399
Because we started when everything was virtual, and our tops were really, really busy-like, and our models were trash.

00:14:42.720 --> 00:14:48.960
We were like, Wake up! We had this long as they can't see what's going on at the bottom.

00:14:49.200 --> 00:15:02.080
But uh, we have traveled together, we did um uh our first tour, which was Detroit, but these two ladies right here, they make it look like what I'm doing is easy, it's because they are doing it heavy lifting.

00:15:09.279 --> 00:15:10.559
All right, muzzle time.

00:15:22.399 --> 00:15:25.039
Hey, what's up, parenting up family?

00:15:25.279 --> 00:15:25.919
Guess what?

00:15:26.080 --> 00:15:28.799
Have you ever wanted to connect with other caregivers?

00:15:29.200 --> 00:15:31.919
You want to see more behind the scenes footage?

00:15:32.080 --> 00:15:34.399
Wanna know what me and Zetti are doing?

00:15:35.120 --> 00:15:36.159
I know you do.

00:15:36.399 --> 00:15:40.879
All things J Smile are finally ready for you.

00:15:41.919 --> 00:15:44.399
Even when I go live, uh-huh.

00:15:45.200 --> 00:15:49.440
Do it now with us on Patreon.

00:15:49.679 --> 00:15:52.639
Join us in the Patreon community.

00:15:52.879 --> 00:15:55.200
Catch everything we're doing.

00:15:55.440 --> 00:16:01.519
Visit patreon.com forward slash J Smiles Studios.

00:16:04.080 --> 00:16:08.159
Can y'all believe the parenting up podcast community is five years old?

00:16:08.320 --> 00:16:09.840
Like, where did the time go?

00:16:10.000 --> 00:16:17.840
I remember when the Holy Spirit bullied me into even starting this podcast, and now we have been on tour.

00:16:18.000 --> 00:16:20.720
We got a whole podcast production feed.

00:16:21.360 --> 00:16:23.440
Shout out to Annalise and Mia.

00:16:23.840 --> 00:16:26.320
And look, Andrew, look at you.

00:16:27.200 --> 00:16:34.159
But it's amazing when you follow that inner voice that tells you people need this.

00:16:34.320 --> 00:16:35.679
Please do this for other people.

00:16:35.919 --> 00:16:43.519
When you put yourself aside and do the great things for other people, then the world starts to open up.

00:16:47.120 --> 00:16:48.000
It's amazing.

00:16:48.320 --> 00:17:04.240
So we just had a three-hour party celebrating five years of the fair thing of the podcast, celebrating very 77 years old, and celebrating free and support within the family caregiver community.

00:17:04.400 --> 00:17:05.680
We have people from California.

00:17:07.200 --> 00:17:17.279
We have people from California, from New York, from Texas, from Cincinnati, from Chicago, LA, Boston, Philadelphia.

00:17:17.359 --> 00:17:19.200
Like, isn't that crazy?

00:17:19.599 --> 00:17:22.160
Like, four or five cities in Texas.

00:17:22.240 --> 00:17:23.440
I'm like, are you kidding me?

00:17:23.599 --> 00:17:25.920
Like, are we really moving the needle?

00:17:26.400 --> 00:17:29.680
Thank y'all for helping me move the needle.

00:17:30.000 --> 00:17:34.720
Thank y'all for helping me make sure that family caregivers can be seen.

00:17:34.960 --> 00:17:36.240
Y'all, we had a blast.

00:17:36.400 --> 00:17:40.559
So much so I parted out of my heels.

00:17:41.200 --> 00:17:46.079
I don't like taking off my shoes till I get home, but tonight, y'all, they won't me out.

00:17:46.400 --> 00:17:47.680
They smiled out.

00:17:48.000 --> 00:17:49.279
The snuggle up.

00:17:52.720 --> 00:17:55.119
I don't know where to begin.

00:17:55.440 --> 00:18:01.440
How do you put into words hours of love and joy?

00:18:01.680 --> 00:18:03.359
That's what just happened.

00:18:03.680 --> 00:18:08.240
I am standing right in the Buckhead Art Company.

00:18:08.400 --> 00:18:11.759
It's a gallery in the middle of Buckhead.

00:18:12.319 --> 00:18:13.680
It means a lot to me.

00:18:13.759 --> 00:18:19.200
It's extra because one of my Howard University Alpha Chapel School Awards owns it.

00:18:19.599 --> 00:18:20.799
And it's gorgeous.

00:18:20.960 --> 00:18:21.279
Okay?

00:18:21.839 --> 00:18:34.240
The number of people who talked to my mother and loved on her tonight because it was her birthday, I can't even count them.

00:18:35.039 --> 00:18:35.519
Period.

00:18:35.680 --> 00:18:41.440
Like Zettie was smiling and hugging and grinning so much, it was like she just turned 16.

00:18:42.079 --> 00:18:47.519
My greatest takeaway from this is caregivers have a village.

00:18:47.680 --> 00:18:49.759
Y'all, we really aren't alone.

00:18:50.079 --> 00:18:59.680
People do see us, they appreciate us, they love us, they're praying for us, and they got our back.

00:19:00.319 --> 00:19:11.759
Everybody in the building kept talking about how much they do for their loved ones and how much their friends and family assist them.

00:19:11.920 --> 00:19:26.240
So I think we are starting to make a dip in the world around how people think about Alzheimer's, how people think about dementia, and then how they can in turn support each other.

00:19:26.480 --> 00:19:30.960
When I first started this podcast, it was a lot more bleak.

00:19:31.119 --> 00:19:35.279
There was a lot more despair whenever you saw a caregiver or you met one.

00:19:35.440 --> 00:19:42.319
It was like, I don't know where to go, I don't know what to do, I ain't been on a date, I ain't got my hair comb, I didn't gain 20 pounds.

00:19:43.920 --> 00:19:46.640
But listen, the pandemic is over.

00:19:47.680 --> 00:20:00.160
It had us so um cloistered and sequestered that we ended up finding how to live amongst each other in isolation.

00:20:00.319 --> 00:20:06.079
If you can figure out how to live in isolation, you can damn sure know how to live when outside open back up.

00:20:06.720 --> 00:20:10.160
The beauty in it is, I can't tell y'all this enough.

00:20:10.319 --> 00:20:14.079
We aren't alone, caregivers, family caregivers, we aren't alone.

00:20:14.240 --> 00:20:21.599
Ask that cousin, ask that neighbor, ask that person at your church if they are a chiropractor or a dentist.

00:20:21.839 --> 00:20:27.920
Maybe they will take care of your loved one and service them for free or half off because they know you're a caregiver.

00:20:28.160 --> 00:20:33.440
That's the kind of networking that happened here at our reception.

00:20:33.759 --> 00:20:39.920
People were giving of their services freely and from the heart.

00:20:40.160 --> 00:20:42.559
All Zaddy's caregivers were here.

00:20:42.880 --> 00:20:53.039
Her physical therapist came, and it was a good thing he did, though, because y'all, at the end of that 90 minutes, Zaddy was about to pass out.

00:20:53.200 --> 00:20:56.640
But he is a very, shall we say, strong man.

00:20:56.799 --> 00:21:01.759
He is Nigerian, and everything you think about Nigerians, he is that, okay?

00:21:02.000 --> 00:21:07.440
He basically carried Zaddy's ass out to the car, and I was like, praise God, you got him right in time.

00:21:08.000 --> 00:21:12.640
So we had a ball, we had a party, we were eating, we were drinking.

00:21:12.960 --> 00:21:26.400
Most importantly, we were acknowledging each other and the world that has been created because family caregivers demand that their LOs be treated properly.